We Don’t Belong Here

One of the pivotal contributors to the success of political movements lies in their level of hospitality towards newcomers. A direct correlation can be observed between the ability to make individuals feel at home and the subsequent success of an initiative. As a result, collectivist practices, whether from the right or left, easily gain momentum, while individualist ones, despite possessing stronger arguments and proper incentives, often struggle.

Discussing community belonging and political success is one aspect, but the monumental cultural shift regarding group identity and a sense of belonging is noteworthy. The concept of subculture can be traced back to the Middle Ages, or perhaps even earlier, yet it was officially termed in the 1950s. With the development of modern communication technologies, subcultures evolved into microcultures, monocultures, and eventually, identities. Essentially, we exchanged our personhood for extended identities, manifesting as personas. While this may be viewed as a consequence of the individualist paradigm shift, it can also be critically examined. Despite the shift from the collective to the individual, there seems to be a lack of knowledge on how to effectively build and live in a community without compromising essential interpersonal qualities such as a sense of belonging.

According to Dictionary.com, “to belong” has two meanings: to be in the relation of a member, adherent, inhabitant, etc., and to have the proper social qualifications to be a member of a group. This underscores that belonging creates a sense of qualification and worth, a coveted aspect that, when attained, is cherished. However, it can inadvertently become inhibitory to personal development, as none of us would willingly feel worthless.

Despite the stronghold of belonging, it appears that Gen-Z does not feel a sense of belonging. While direct data may be lacking, observable trends include job-hopping, changing social circles, reluctance to invest in relationships, and a prevalent belief among Gen-Z that there are no political parties or movements that adequately represent them. This trend, not limited to the United States, suggests a rupture in faith in belonging between millennials and Gen-Z. One primary factor speculated for this disconnection is the feeling of betrayal when individuals and places where belonging was assumed fail to provide support. Gen-Z faces criticism for being perceived as narcissistic, but from a Zillennial perspective, this criticism is understandable.

Belonging is a reciprocal relationship, where the recently joined member serves the community, and in return, the community supports them, whether financially or socially. When an expectation of devotion exists without the intention to reciprocate, it implies a win-lose scenario or self-sacrifice. In a society resembling a Ponzi scheme, self-sacrifice may seem reasonable, but it is neither sustainable nor beneficial. Consequently, this unreasonable demand is rejected by the youth, leaving them with a lingering sense of loss regarding belonging. Furthermore, they face substantial criticism for not adhering to the self-sacrifice norms of previous generations. Interestingly, as the youth continues to challenge norms and demand more, they are often labeled as selfish and spoiled. While acknowledging that Gen-Z has its challenges, I see their rejection of unreasonable demands as a valid stance.

The need for a sense of belonging and the desire for people who belong with us are undeniable. Social cohesion is ingrained in us, often experienced during crises, yet returning to daily life leaves things unchanged. Communities founded on mutual values may transform into cult like organisms, and individuals may find themselves not fitting in where they come from. In such situations, the responsibility primarily lies with those in power to create inclusive spaces for newcomers to thrive, a responsibility often unmet. For the rest of humanity, fostering belonging begins on an individual level. In an atomized world, creating a sense of belonging becomes more crucial than ever. While I can’t provide a comprehensive recipe or solution, a reasonable starting point appears to be focusing on what we can give and the responsibility we can undertake.